|A tiny visitor.|
Unfortunately, my retirement was short-lived. After about six weeks, I was back helping out my former bosses and beginning to work almost full time for a few weeks until a new replacement could be found. Perhaps this time around, I’ll be able to focus on finding someone who will move my former position forward and reliably do the job.
Gardening has become my refuge – as it has for the past three years – from all of this turmoil. Planting flowers and pruning my existing plants calms me and gives me a tangible feeling of accomplishment. Flowers are a thing of beauty. Their natural perfection and color are awesome. Made by nature, not man. Yet, I have some control and some authority over my flowers and plants. I can decide where they go, how much sun they’ll receive, and how big or small they will become.
It’s this feeling of control – or lack of control – that has me so frustrated and angry right now. I don’t want to be at my old job. I don’t want all of those headaches and problems any longer. I don’t want to decide how to “handle things” or make decisions about someone’s future. That is why I left the “work world” in mid-January…to get away from the daily grind and bullshit.
So gardening is my therapy – my way to get back some of that lost control and focus. The plants and their respective flower beds are my sanctuary against the man-made noise of work. I know my time in the “work world” will end soon, but I’m so frustrated. Thank God – in more ways than one – for my plants!